An Indirect Hurt

     As I mentioned in a previous and very recent blog (Two roads...), I have this good friend who I like as more than a friend but have chosen to keep my feelings suppressed. But today was a real test of my will.
     You see, have you ever liked someone, and because so, however they are feeling, you are feeling too? Thats the predicament I am currently in.  This friend of mine is just going through a hard time and it sucks because I just feel helpless in helping her. It's out of my control, and just like anybody, I don't like when things are out of my control.
     It's just I saw the way she just seemed so overwhelmed and distraught and it hurt me knowing there was nothing I could do. I just wanted so much to grab her by the arm, pull her close into me, kiss her gently on the forehead, and tell her that it's going to be alright, that she's going to make it through, and that I'm going to be with her every step of the way. To let her know if she falls, I'm there to catch her.
     But that's when the dilemma of hiding my true feelings come into effect. I can't very well do any of that without showing how I feel. But hell, I feel like I'm at this point in our friendship where there's very little I can do that won't unmask the truth. And that's the last thing I want because I dont want to scare her away. The friendship we have means the world to me. But more specifically, she just might mean the world to me. And seeing her struggle, hurts, but more specifically, seeing her struggle knowing there's nothing I can do without revealing the one truth that might scare her off...that, that right there, that hurts the most.